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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23393974">Leagues Ahead (OR Julian the Hottie)</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ConceptaDecency/pseuds/ConceptaDecency'>ConceptaDecency</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The Cardassian Gossip Mill [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Star Trek: Deep Space Nine</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Dialogue-Only, Humor, Humour, M/M, Post-Canon</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 16:16:04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>330</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23393974</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ConceptaDecency/pseuds/ConceptaDecency</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Garak is the subject of office gossip.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Julian Bashir/Elim Garak</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>The Cardassian Gossip Mill [1]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1703380</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>54</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>247</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Leagues Ahead (OR Julian the Hottie)</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>A little silly thing I came up with over lunch. Original alternate title was going to be 'Julian the Hot Wife' but that's a kink for another story.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>"So it seems that Minister Garak was doing more than hemming trousers on that space station."</p><p>"Yeah, of course he was. He was spying for the Obsidian Order."</p><p>"That's not what I meant. And he wasn't spying for the Obsidian Order. He was working for the liberation of Cardassia."</p><p>"Well, I heard he was also spying for the Obsidian Order and that's why he was there in the first place."</p><p>"Eh, maybe. I don't think so, though."</p><p>"What do you want, Parda? I need to finish this report for Minister Ebany."</p><p>"Well if you're going to be snippy I <em>won't</em> tell you what else Minister Garak was doing on Terok Nor."</p><p>"Okay, <em>fine</em>. Tell me. I'm sorry for being snippy."</p><p>"He's suddenly got a betrothed."</p><p>"And? I'm happy for him. He's far too old to be single."</p><p> "<em>And</em> he's a <em>Federaji</em>."<br/>
 <br/>
 "Garak's a <em>Federaji</em>? Can...he still be Minister for Communications if he's got foreign citizenship?"<br/>
 <br/>
 "No, I mean his betrothed is a <em>Federaji</em>. Someone he knew when he was living on the station.<br/>
 <br/>
 "Oh. Ew. What kind of <em>Federaji</em>?"<br/>
 <br/>
 "Human." <br/>
 <br/>
 "Parda, you shouldn't be spreading nasty rumours about people. Just because Minister Garak isn't married doesn't mean he's desperate."<br/>
 <br/>
 "It's true! But I don't think Garak's with him out of desperation. Look."<br/>
 <br/>
 "..."<br/>
 <br/>
 "I. KNOW!"<br/>
 <br/>
 "He's <em>gorgeous</em>. How did Garak convince that piece of zabu flesh to enjoin with him?"<br/>
 <br/>
 "Anyone's guess. Maybe he's ugly by human standards?"<br/>
 <br/>
 "Yeah, maaaaybe. They are a pretty degenerate species. Or...maybe Garak's attractive by human standards?"<br/>
 <br/>
 "Come on! You think humans were throwing themselves at <em>Garak</em> on Terok Nor? With that stubby little neck?"<br/>
 <br/>
 "Yeah, why not? They're <em>aliens</em>, Parda. They have <em>lower standards</em> than us."<br/>
 <br/>
 "Maybe that's why he stayed so long."<br/>
 <br/>
 "Probably. OH BY THE UNION! You can see his collarbone in this one. Send me the link, will you?"<br/>
 <br/>
 "What about your report?"<br/>
 <br/>
 "Chaos take my report. Ebany can wait another ten minutes. I'm on my tea break, aren't I?"</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Poor Garak. Hope he doesn't overhear. Or maybe he'd enjoy it? Anyway, these characters are maybe the worst people I've ever written. Glad I don't know them. </p><p>Comments and kudos are very welcome and encouraging!</p><p>Editing to add that this story was at least somewhat inspired by <a href="https://adigeon.tumblr.com/post/169642373332/thought-i-had-while-driving-the-cardassians-we">this Tumblr post</a>. Thanks to <a href="https://archiveofourown.org/users/the_last_dillards">the_last-dillards</a> for pointing me in the right direction down there in the comments section!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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